


That Sinking Feeling

by rainfall



Category: Digimon Adventure, Digimon Adventure tri.
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Multi, One-Sided(?) Romance, Pre-OT3, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-16
Updated: 2015-12-16
Packaged: 2018-05-07 00:36:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5436875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainfall/pseuds/rainfall
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Leave them alone."</p><p>"But..."</p><p>"Can't? They've both grown up so handsome~... What're you gonna do, Sora-san?"</p><p>(Post-Episode 3, Mimi's words are haunting her.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	That Sinking Feeling

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: There is a brief, glossed-over implication of sexual assault in here. Not something that happened to any canon characters.

Mimi's words were haunting her, that was the only word for it. How they came back to her again and again, reverberating deeper and deeper inside her.

_They've both grown up so handsome~... What're you gonna do, Sora-san?_

Teasing. Careless. Nothing she had meant with any real intensity, of course. Surely not. How _could_ she have?

For most of the years Sora had known her, Mimi had been an ocean away. Coming back to visit every now and then, of course, and every time Sora was happy to see her -- every time, they clicked right away, and for however long she stayed in Japan they were the very best of friends again... but Mimi hadn't been by her side that night three years ago, when she'd finally screwed up her courage and asked Yamato if he had ever thought of her as more than just a friend.

Mimi hadn't been there when Taichi turned up, unexpected. And even if she _had_ been, no one else but Sora knew how her insides had twisted, how she'd suddenly felt exposed and foolish and... confused.

How she'd almost hesitated, almost let all that courage go to waste, almost felt... torn in a way that had made no sense and _still_ made no sense and, either way, was a secret she had never told anyone! Not even Piyomon.

Her old, childish crush on Taichi was just that -- old and childish, no match for her real and present and _grown-up_ feelings for his best friend.

_They've both grown up so handsome..._

And, okay, that part was true enough to make heat flood into her cheeks all over again.

Though they were as different as night and day, the sun and the moon -- Yamato with his sharp cheekbones and his rare smiles and his perfect autumn sky eyes; Taichi with his strong jaw and his infectious laughter and his eyes like lit amber... there was no question that they were both...

She shakes her head to clear it. What they are is _important to her_. What they are is two of her oldest, closest friends.

_What're you gonna do, Sora-san?_

As if there was anything for her to do! Even if... even if Mimi, only-here-for-a-few-weeks Mimi, couldn't-possibly-know-how-Sora-felt Mimi... was somehow, improbably, _impossibly_ , right.

So what if a stupid scheduling conflict still left her feeling frazzled and _torn_? So what if when she went to a museum with her boyfriend, she sometimes missed Taichi -- when she went to the movies with Taichi, she missed her boyfriend! It wasn't as if she wasn't happy.

Wasn't as if she didn't love Yamato, who had been nothing but good to her for three years. Who took her out several times a week, always remembered her birthday -- White Day -- all their anniversaries, even the silliest ones she could never have expected. Who had written a dozen songs about her, to the playful complaints of his bandmates.

And... while all of her friends now have at least one story of a time when a boyfriend or even just an ambitious date tried to rush them into more than they were ready for... Yamato had only ever kissed her. Sometimes gently; sometimes in ways that made her toes curl and made her wonder if, maybe, she _wasn't_ ready for something more... but never with any pressure.

He made her feel safe. Valued. _Loved_.

_And you think Taichi wouldn't?_

No, of course not. In his own way, she was sure Taichi would have been a wonderful boyfriend, too. Maybe forgetting anniversaries sometimes, but bringing the lucky girl little things all the time to remind her he cared... And for all that he could be wild sometimes, Sora was sure he would have still taken things slowly, checked in on her -- the hypothetical her -- over and over, making sure that each little touch was okay before...

And anyway, that wasn't the point! It didn't matter whether or not Taichi _would have_ been a good boyfriend, because she already _had_ a boyfriend. A wonderful boyfriend. It wasn't as if she wasn't happy.

Wasn't as if she even _could have_ broken up with Yamato, and then ever asked his best friend out. Oh, no. Sora had been friends with mostly-boys long enough to know how well _that_ usually worked out. The boys would _first_ get into a fistfight, then never look at her ever again, and possibly also never look at _each other_ ever again.

Instead of a new relationship, she'd be out two friends. Maybe more -- she wasn't sure either Hikari or Takeru would really appreciate her treatment of their brothers.

So, she could stop dating Yamato, and maybe if she was lucky they could all go back to being only friends, with the added benefit of Yamato no longer taking it quite so personally when she was forced to choose between them and, rarely, chose to spend time with Taichi instead...

Except -- and, oh, this was an ugly thought, she wished she'd never had it... -- except that, unlike Taichi, she could be reasonably certain Yamato would have another girlfriend before the year was out.

Was _that_ why she'd-- Had she thought, of the two of them, Taichi would stay... would still be there for her, instead of... Oh, Sora did not like this thought at all.

She wasn't that type of person. She had never, ever, ever wanted either of them to be unhappy. That was why Taichi's expression when he realized why she was hanging around Yamato's trailer that night -- in those few seconds before he'd worked a smile onto his face -- had stuck with her all these years.

But she couldn't deny that the thought of Taichi, of either of them, with some other girl on his arm... left her feeling hollow and cold.

 _I didn't make a choice,_ she argued with herself, because right up until the moment Taichi had found her there, it hadn't felt like a choice at all. She hadn't known.

Even in the moment, hadn't been quite sure.

He'd smiled so convincingly. Encouraged her. Given her a little push, more literal than his usual pushes through the years.

And now she was here, three years later, and she was happy. They were _all_ happy.

Weren't they?

**Author's Note:**

> One word for you, Sora: polyamory.
> 
> Expect like, two more Sora POV things from me before I get this out of my system lol. :( This scene! Mimi, what were you getting attttt.


End file.
